 Image : Google Anger is often perceived as an emotion to be controlled, suppressed, or avoided. In many cultures and families, people are taught from a young age that expressing anger is unacceptable or dangerous. However, from a psychodynamic perspective, anger is rarely just about a present situation—it is often rooted in deeper, unresolved emotional wounds, particularly those linked to trauma. In my practice, I frequently work with clients who experience anger in ways that feel overwhelming, confusing, or even frightening. Rather than seeing anger as a problem to be "fixed," I encourage slowing down, reflecting, and exploring its origins. When we understand anger as a response to trauma, it can become a gateway to healing rather than a force of destruction. Understanding Anger Through a Trauma LensTrauma, whether from childhood neglect, abuse, violence, relational wounds, or overwhelming life events, has a profound impact on the nervous system and emotional regulation. Trauma survivors often experience heightened emotional reactivity, difficulty trusting others, and a deep-seated fear of vulnerability. Anger, in this context, serves multiple psychological and physiological functions:
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 Google image We all have desires we wish to fulfil and goals we aim to achieve, often requiring clear and practical steps to reach them. Yet, we frequently undermine these aspirations ourselves. Self-sabotage is one of the most puzzling aspects of human behaviour. This can range from small acts, like breaking a diet by indulging in a big piece of chocolate cake, to more significant decisions, such as entering a relationship we know is bound to end badly. At its extreme, self-sabotage can manifest in highly destructive behaviours, like self-harm, risky actions, or addiction. But why do we do this?
 Image: Google Why therapy work is still an on-going discussion, but when it does work - it often mirrors the attachment dynamics found in good parenting.Attachment theory, initially developed by John Bowlby and Mary Ainsworth in the mid-20th century, has had a profound influence on psychotherapy. This theory posits that the bonds formed between babies and their primary caregivers have a lasting impact on an individual's emotional and relational patterns throughout their life. In the context of psychotherapy, understanding attachment styles can greatly enhance the therapeutic process and outcome, especially when it comes to healing from emotional distress or trauma.
 Image: Google The perception of neediness and emotional dependency often carries negative connotation in our society: in psychotherapy; individuals, particularly those unfamiliar with the process, may hold a doubtful view of clients or patients who lean heavily on their therapist for support. There's even a cynical notion that therapists intentionally foster emotional dependency to gain an advantage. It's a prevailing belief that emotional dependency within psychotherapy is seen as undesirable.
 Understanding the Burden of Shame and Guilt Shame and guilt are complex and often deeply ingrained emotions that can significantly impact our mental health and wellbeing. As a counsellor or psychotherapist at Misma Counselling Service, I believe it’s crucial to understand these emotions and explore how they can affect our lives. I think - for me, that the dynamics of shame and guilt is perhaps one of my reasons that lead me to want to study the mind, as I wished to understand the ability to undermine our pursuit of a good enough life.
 Image; Google In our modern society, discussion around men’s health often focus on physical wellbeing, leaving mental health in the shadows. However, it’s crucial to recognise that mental health is just as important as physical health for leading a fulfilling and balanced life. In this blog post, we’ll look into the significance of men’s mental health, common challenges they face, and practical strategies to promote mental wellbeing.
 "I was able 'to sit' with my feelings and emotions. I no longer have the need to binge or purge this emotions" shared my client who worked through their eating disorders. Understanding eating disorders can be challenging if you haven't experienced them yourself. While many are familiar with anorexia and bulimia, there are lesser-known disorders like AFRID (Avoidant/Restrictive Food Intake Disorder). Diagnosing these disorders is complex due to the overlapping symptoms, and they may manifest differently at various stages of one's life.
The current pandemic is leaving many of us anxious and worried. Uncertainty and the unknown shake our basic life routines, we loose our life structures, leaving us feeling confused and lost. Confusion and loss can create a negative imagination and this is fear. The fear of contagion and the virus can impact on our psychological responses.
 Google image Understanding the Alarming Reality: Suicide Rates in MenSuicide is a global public health concern that affects millions of individuals and families each year. It is a complex issue with various contributing factors, including mental health struggles, societal pressures, and individual circumstances. One significant aspect that demands attention is the higher incidence of suicide in men. I revisit the blog I did a few years ago, and this blog will explore the reasons behind this troubling statistic and navigate potential pathway for prevention and support.
Can A Relationship Survive After Cheating?Indeed, it's important to recognise that there are many other reasons for cheating, some of which may have little to do with the dynamics, attitudes, appearances, or behaviours of either partner in the relationship. Let's explore a constructive approach to repairing your relationship and rebuilding the trust that was shattered by infidelity. In this blog, I'll explore the various factors that influence the potential for recovery. "If the feeling is mutual, the effort will be equal" |
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